WHAT ARE OUR CHILDREN LEARNING AT SCHOOL?

Ibn ‘Umar reported the saying of the Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace);

“All of you are shepherds and each of you is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of the people of his house and he is responsible. A woman is the shepherd of the house of her husband and she is responsible. Each of you is a shepherd and each is responsible for his flock.” (narrated by Imam Bukhari)

Our children are thus our responsibility, and we will be questioned about the means by which we raised them when we come before our Lord (Exalted is He).

Imam Ghazali says,

‘A child is a trust in the care of his parents, for his pure heart is a precious uncut jewel devoid of any form or carving, which will accept being cut into any shape, and will be disposed according to the guidance it receives from others. If it is habituated to and instructed in goodness then this will be its practice when it grows up, and it will attain to felicity in this world and the next; its parents too, and all its teachers and preceptors, will share in its reward. Similarly, should it be habituated to evil and neglected as though it were an animal, then misery and perdition will be its lot, and the responsibility for this will be borne by its guardian and supervisor. For God (Exalted is He!) has said, “Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire.” [Quran, 66:6]

(From Book XXI of Ihya’ `Ulum al-Din, translated by Abdul Hakim Murad)

We can see how precious our children are, and that it is wajib (obligatory) upon us to take responsibility for their tarbiyah (upbringing). In this day and age, many parents need to work in order to pay the bills, and unfortunately presume that their children will be adequately raised by their teachers, both in secular schools and in madrassa also. There is no problem in providing for your family, as it is a part of taking responsibility – but that is only the economic side. What about your child’s spiritual upbringing?

Since we live in the UK, often our children are exposed to non-Islamic teachings, to children of other faiths and to so many outside influences that it is easy for a child to be affected by these things. If their parents haven’t taken care to teach them about their faith, and given them a good example of what it is to be a Muslim, they can easily be led astray, and perhaps even leave Islam (May Allah protect us!).

We cannot blame the teachers, the schools, or even the religious scholars in the madrassas if our children are moving away from deen – rather it is our responsibility and Allah (Exalted is He) will ask us about it…

So what can we do? The first thing is to take an active interest in what our child is learning in school. We need to divide our time between our work and our chores for what should be our most important concern, which is the development of our children. It would not be difficult to spend forty minutes every day going over what our children have learnt in school and to advise if there is anything contrary to Islamic teachings.

Secondly, parents can become acquainted with the school’s Board of Governors, in order to make changes to the school’s curriculum if needed – because if Muslims do not make it known that they are opposed to certain elements in the curriculum they will stay there and countless Muslim children will be exposed to them.

Also, if we send our children to madrassa, we should sit with them and help them learn how to read Qur’an and the important daily du’as which they learn there. We can thereby create an Islamic environment at home. Our children will be able to face any outside problems with ease, because they have been nurtured Islamically.

Remember, ‘Uthman ibn ‘Affan narrated that our Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) said:

“The best of you is whoever learns Qur’an and then teaches it.” (narrated by Bukhari)

So what better thing can we do than to make sure our children gain a true respect and understanding of Islam? This will not only benefit them in this life when they face opposition to their faith, but will also benefit them and us in the Akhira insha Allah.

May Allah grant us the ability to raise our children upon the truth.

Rabbana hab lana min azwajina wa dhurriyatina qurrata a’yun, wa j’alna lil muttaqina imama

O Allah grant us from our spouses and children such who are a source of the coolness of our eyes, and make us Imams for the righteous. Ameen.